Are You a Pleaser or a Helper? How to Protect Your Energy and Succeed at Work

When it comes to people pleasing I think most of us feel guilty of this from time to time. Mostly this is because we are aware of the things that will make life easier or more comfortable for the other person.

So firstly let’s talk about the difference between being that sensitive helper and the pleaser.

If you’re a pleaser, you help because you feel guilty or obliged. Your plans are dropped to assist someone else (and no, this isn’t about emergencies). You’re following someone else’s agenda, feel pressured to say yes, and often end up drained or resentful.

When you’re helping, it’s different. Helping comes from genuine concern for someone’s wellbeing. You decide you have the time and resources to offer your support. You feel able to say no, organise help around your plans, and it feels good to give.

But how do you make that shift from pleaser to helper? And how does this behaviour impact your energy in the workplace?

Are You a Pleaser or a Helper? How to Protect Your Energy and Succeed at Work

 

So in this post, I’m going to answer the questions of how to protect your energy as well as 3 Practical Tools to Stop People Pleasing.

 

We’ll start by talking about the Chakras involved:

1 – Solar Plexus Chakra

2 – Heart Chakra

3 – Throat Chakra

 

The Chakras Involved in Pleaser Tendencies

Pleaser tendencies often show up as imbalances in your energy system, particularly in these chakras:

1 – Solar Plexus Chakra (Personal Power)

Located in your upper abdomen, this chakra governs your sense of self worth and confidence. When it’s out of balance, you may feel powerless to say no or compelled to earn others’ approval.

  • Try this affirmation: “I trust my decisions, and it’s safe to set boundaries.” Place your hand over your solar plexus as you repeat it.

2 – Heart Chakra (Balance in Giving and Receiving)

An overactive heart chakra leads to giving too much of yourself, leaving you feeling resentful and burned out.

  • Visualise a green light surrounding your heart. As you exhale, imagine sending love to yourself first, then extending it to others. This reinforces the balance between giving and receiving.

3 – Throat Chakra (Self Expression)

Difficulty expressing your needs or saying no stems from an underactive throat chakra. You may feel unheard or unable to advocate for yourself.

  • Practice speaking affirmations like: “My voice matters, and I am heard.” Use the sway test to practice setting boundaries and honouring your energy.

 

(Pssssst…. You can 📌 pin this article for reference to your “Protect Your Energy” board!)

 

reclaim your energy to helper not please

 

Are You a Pleaser?

From a young age, many pleasers develop these habits because of their sensitive nature. They modify their behavior to avoid conflict, gain approval, or protect others.

As adults, these tendencies often spill into the workplace, where pleasers overcommit, take on others’ responsibilities, and eventually feel undervalued or burned out.

Sound familiar? Here are some practical tools you can implement to start shifting this pattern:

3 Practical Tools to Stop People Pleasing

 

  1. Ground Yourself Before Making Decisions

When asked to take on something extra, pause and check in with your energy. Take three deep breaths and ask yourself:

  • “Does this align with my energy and capacity right now?”
  • “Will saying yes leave me feeling drained or fulfilled?”

If you’re unsure, use your sway test or finger testing to confirm.

 

  1. Set a Simple Boundary Script

If you struggle to say no, prepare a few boundary scripts you can use in the moment:

  • “Thank you for asking, but I can’t take that on right now.”
  • “Let me check my schedule and get back to you.”

Practicing these in advance builds confidence and makes them easier to use when needed.

 

  1. Reclaim Your Energy After Overcommitting

Already said yes but regret it? Visualise cutting the energetic cord between you and the commitment. Imagine releasing guilt and reclaiming your time and energy.

You can also use this simple affirmation: “I release what no longer serves me and call my energy back to myself.”

 

From Pleaser to Empowered Helper

Being sensitive to others’ feelings is your superpower. But to use it effectively, you must learn to separate your energy from the people around you and my Resilience Starter Kit will help.

By setting boundaries and reconnecting with your own needs, you can transform your sensitivity into a strength.

When you master this shift, you’ll find:

  • Less resentment and more energy for what truly matters.
  • A stronger connection to your inner self and values.
  • Greater satisfaction in helping others without losing yourself.

Imagine how your work and relationships would flourish if you focused your sensitivity on creating balance instead of burnout.

 

Ready to Reclaim Your Energy?

… If you’re ready to find your purpose & protect your energy at work – with ease, every day – I have something to help you get started

 

 

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